Last week, I hit the pause button on everything I needed to
“get done”, and spent a half a day in prayer, reflection, and devotional
reading. It was so hard to “shut down”
and “shut out” all of the pressing distractions. Yet, God broke through my busyness and met
with me in a very special way.
One book that helped me in the process was Brennan Manning’s
Abba’s Child. I re-read most of
book in one setting. Wow, I needed this special reminder that I am loved by
God, regardless of what I do, whether or not my performance for Him or others
was satisfactory or not, and regardless of what my own thoughts or feelings may
be telling me. Its hard for me to really believe that God honestly loves me as
I am.
A few of the ideas and word pictures that Brennan Manning
used to help me get reconnected with the Love of my Father were statements like
these:
·
“In my experience, self hatred is the dominant
malaise crippling Christians and stifling their growth in the Holy Spirit. . .
. We learn to be gentle with ourselves by experiencing the intimate, heartfelt
compassion of Jesus”.
·
“For many years I hid from my true self through
my performance in ministry. I
constructed an identity through sermons, books, and storytelling. I rationalized that if the majority of
Christians thought well of me, there was nothing wrong with me. The more I invested in ministerial success,
the more real the imposter became”. He goes on to write about living by grace,
not by performance and not as a people pleaser!
·
“Define yourself radically as one Beloved by
God. God’s love for you and his choice
of you constitute your worth. Accept
that, and let it become the most important thing in your life”.
·
“My identity as Abba’s Child is not an
abstraction or a tap dance into religiousity.
It is the core truth of my existence.
Living in the wisdom of accepted tenderness profoundly affects my
perception of reality, the way I respond to people and their life situations”.
·
Manning writes about the idea “present
risenness, and living in the reality of the resurrection of Jesus Christ. He says, “The resurrection of Jesus must be
experienced as more than just a past historical event. In other words, the resurrection needs to be
experienced as present risenness”. He
goes on to write, “ The present risenness of Jesus as life giving Spirit means
that I can cope with anything. I am not
on my own”. As Paul writes in Ephesians
1:18-19, “I pray that you may realize . . . how vast are the resources of His
Spirit available to us”.
These and other powerful ideas in Manning’s classic work
helped to keep my own passion for Jesus alive.
I came again to discover that the Spirit of Jesus is alive in my
life. I was reminded again, that while
the enemy seeks to undermine the reality of being “Beloved by God”, that God is
able to break through the enemy’s lies.
I came to realize that while all of the work and responsibilities that
hang over my head are important, there is still one thing more important, and
that is staying connected with the true Source of spiritual life and
power. At the end of my little half day
with God, I actually broke down in tears, feeling like a needy helpless child,
but a helpless child falling into the arms of a tender, loving Father. God thank you for loving me with an
everlasting love. For the moment, I’m
just resting in that love!
In Jesus love,
Dan Peterson
A fellow traveler
